Tuesday, July 8, 2008

better

hey kids,


so i was not feeling too good yesterday but i'm much better now. i went in to work late this morning because we had breakfast with hasmik (the AGBU coordinator who got us our internships). anyway this is the one day i should have been in at nine, because they went out taking photos of yerevan and stuff. damn! anyway they do this every week. what i don't understand is why they did not tell me this earlier. so now i know, and i'll go with them sometime next week. otherwise there really isn't much for me to do. i asked the priest to bless the crosses i got for my family and he has to do it at etchmiadzin. also i asked if i could interview him concerning women's issues and he didn't quite like the idea, but i told him i'd give him the questions in advance and he agreed. i think he'll only answer if he "likes" the questions, though.


one thing i really like is the language classes. our teacher (whose name i forget) is extremely passionate about the armenian language. she is beautiful and hearing her speak is such a joy even if i don't understand everything. apparently for armenians here, our western armenian is the fancy one. to them it's as though we speak at a university/academic level all the time. anyway. i'm trying now to actually speak like them. and i'm less and less intimidated, i tell them when i don't understand. i don't pretend and smile because then i look stupid. i look stupid anyway, but you know what i mean!


last night after the language class, anette, narine and i met up with chris and agop, two guys from birthright, at chris's place. we made pasta and just had a good time. it was nice to get out of the house, see other people. tonight, we're playing basket-ball!! i cannot wait. the last time i played was over a year ago with walter, one on one, and before that... i don't even know. this should be very fun. apparently the guys get very physical and agressive when they play. agop is the tallest person you've ever seen so he'll kick ass. yesterday he said he'd kick my ass even if i'm on his team. he'll block my lay-ups and everything. so it should be interesting tonight!

Monday, July 7, 2008

the constant in my life

i am disappointed with many things at the moment. i think the fact that i've been here for a week but feel as though it's been two is a strong indication of this.


i do not like my job at the television station. today i came in later because they had a meeting. you know armenian timing, obviously they were not done when i got there. i sat down for two and a half hours just going over the french class i am preparing for the WRC, and also read the pre-arrival packet for YSIP. the pre-arrival packet. that's how bored i was. i told them today i would come in less often and they didn't seem to care much. there is nothing for me to do there, ils ne delegueront certainement aucune taches, so the only reason i will stay there is to get an interview with the der hair for the WRC. at least that job is good.


i don't want to get into it, but i'm disappointed a bit in our group. children, is all i have to say for now.


i'm disappointed with the organization of certain things. yesterday we went to Holy See Etchmiadzin. this is like mecca for armenians. i know this is most definitely not the time to use the lord's name in vain but christ... we waited around for so long. after mass we were supposed to go to the museum. well we apparently missed our tour guide so we had to wait another hour in the insane heat (keep in mind, i'm wearing dressy pants and a too-decent top, because we're in church). when we finally get the tour, it's gorgeous but doesn't last long, a half hour tops. on our way out, we stop, but for no apparent reason. a couple of us just decide to go to the bus, because what's the point of simply waiting around for nothing, especially in that heat. i should also mention that i got my period while in church. uncomfortably much? so we decide to go back to the bus. we loudly, clearly say this to others. after waiting in the bus for a half hour i call one of the girls, and they're back in the museum. seeing more. what the fuck. nobody had told us, and more importantly nobody called us to tell us. i feel like everything we do is half-assed. we stand around making decisions for so long, most of the time for an hour. that is why i'm disappointed in the group. the past two days i've found myself making decisions for everyone along with anette because otherwise it's "ooooh i don't know......" and by the time we've decided it's almost not worth it. we have a fucking curfew, you know?? make the most of the goddamn time you have out. and what bothers me even more is that some people are happy that i'm making decisions. i don't like that at all... they shouldn't be happy that someone else is deciding for them.yeah so everything is going to be like this all the time. we were supposed to be home by two, but got home by 4. it disrupts everything.


and finally, i'm disappointed with myself. i suppose i shouldn't be because all of this is absolutely out of my hands and i'm doing the best i can. i don't think i have ever said that and meant it as much as i do now. but it's hard. i cannot stand being with not only 18 people all the time, but the same 18 people. i'm not used to this, i'm used to spending my days alone. and even when i try locking myself up in my room i hear everyone yelling around the house. je n'ai aucun moment de repit.


i'm also feeling a little guilty in terms of what i am feeling towards armenia. i thought i'd feel so much more emotional and understand my heritage a lot more, and instead, i'm just all the more confused. it really makes you question yourself when you don't feel all that emotional in etchmiadzin, and it's the holy grail. i have to admit that when the priest blessed me, i cried, but otherwise... i didn't feel much. and the place is beautiful. everyone knows i am far from religious and don't necessarily even believe in god. but this place represents so much of our history and i couldn't really feel anything, even though the choir singers had the sweetest voices i've ever heard in my entire life. i feel terrible.


the only way i can possibly imagine having a good time for the rest of the time i'm here is steering clear of everyone when we're not doing mandatory activities.


i feel like i am regressing.

Saturday, July 5, 2008

i've got a phone!

alright, kids! i have a cell phone! i don't know what the area code is to dial out of whichever country you're i (probably 011 or 001) but here it is.
077-22-14-66
yay! so you can send me text messages telling me how much you miss me.

last night we met almost all of the birthright interns. last night the other nairi and i went out with them to eat, when all the other interns went to dance, and we had such a good time. however one person in our group is upset over this for no apparent reason and is acting like a child over it. i feel like we are outgrowing each other within less than a week because for some reason, we do everything together. and i tell them we shouldn't, that by the end of next week there will be tension but some are hard-headed, que veux-tu.... quand on est con!

anyway all this to say i kind of wish i was doing birthright. i have to leave now. bisouz. miss you all.

Friday, July 4, 2008

manuscript book

i should probably mention that there is a high chance i will not come back to montreal on the date i was supposed to. marie-eve is going to be in europe until the sixteenth of august, and i leave yerevan on the third to go to prague, and i might take a train/bus/cheap flight from there to someplace in france, where she is.


speaking of france, i have just et maria, who is basically neighbours with alec (my uncle). she is armenian-lebanese, living in the 11th arrondissement in paris. she is part of the armenia birthright program, which is similar to AGBU's Yerevan Summer Internship Program. The difference though is that they look for their own volunteer work, and they don't stay in one house. they stay with native armenians or rent an appartment, and they have a possibility to be reimbursed for their ticket or something, i think. also they don't have a fucking curfew, and their schedule is not as packed as ours, they can go off to gumri or kharabagh or wherever, whenever they want. i've met a few of the birthright volunteers through the women's ressource center. tonight we are all meeting up for a dance or something... kind of like high school, if you think of it.


papi, i read your e-mail about vartavants and vartavar, you're so funny. khentalen maradz eyi, penav nouyn pane che. but thanks for the reminder about vartavants :)

Thursday, July 3, 2008

"an umbrella!"

there is so much to say...


i guess i'll start with work. i'm working at shoghakat, a tv station, and also at the women's ressource center. shoghakat is actually a religious television station, financed by the etchmiadzin. i had absolutely no clue. so it's not really related to the media. apparently no other station wanted to take in a "non-armenian" and i can see why. the stations are definitely government-regulated. it's too bad, though... my first day at shoghakat i was shown around, and on the second day i was asked what i want to do. basically i think i'll just do some editing, because to be honest they haven't prepared any work for me. i actually felt as though they had no idea who i was when i got there, or what i was supposed to do. so i might do some editing...


i actually fell asleep on my second day. i went to the bathroom just to be able to sleep, and i fell asleep for 45 minutes in one of the control rooms. the night before i'd slept for about three hours. adrina and i went to bed but couldn't stop talking, and then at 4.30am jirair came in saying he had bed bugs and didn't know what to do. he slept on our couch, but then adrina and i got paranoid that there were bugs crawling all over us, so we got up and inspected our beds to make sure we were fine. i slept from five to eight.


ahem, back to work. the women's ressource center is amazing. i'm very impressed. adrina and i are both working here two or three times a week. she will be giving a dance/yoga class to women over 40, and i will be giving a french class. we're also going to be working on a magazine they have called feminist. i love this place. they are a lot more progressive than i expected, and in a country that won't even fund them. oddly enough they get fudning through norwegian and swedish companies who fetched them out! i'm going to be interviewing the der hair (priest) at shoghakat and probably the head director about women in the country and so on and so forth for the magazine. this should be really interesting, there is a lot to do here, unlike shoghakat.


so far we've had a traditional dance class (which is once a week), an armenian class (twice a week), and a history lecture. the language class was great - we are separated into two groups, one for retards and one for geniuses such as myself, and even the genius class is challenging. the history lecture was interesting, to say the least. armen ayvazyan is a well-known armenian historian and we got into a very heated discussion about what it takes to be armenian. he's got a bunch of criteria, and he doesn't have the balls to come out and say it out loud but basically 3/4 of our 18-person group is not armenian in his opinion. he's kind of offensive, arrogant, and attacking, and kept telling us we were wrong. we have another lecture in a few weeks. that should be damn interesting.


we've been going to restaurants but i'm sick of it because we always end up eating non-traditional food. so a couple of us have "complained." also, the traditional food here is not the same as what we have at home. what we eat at home is considered to be influenced by the turks. what they have here is influenced by the russians. so there's a lot of boring salads and coleslaw and chicken... coleslaw. in armenia. seriously. last night a couple of us went to shushi, a dance group, and it was cheesy so we left.


a lot of people have told me to stay away from the water, because i might get sick. however i've been drinking tap water and i'm fine, it actually tastes good. in fact, excuse me for being so graphic but it's the complete opposite of diarrhoea, and i'm not alone. i feel like i'm getting poisoned or something.


we've also been encountering problems with curfew. yes, we have curfew, midnight, because we are such a big group and they need to know where we are. if we're five minutes late they are supposed to close the gate and have us spend the night outside. so far this hasn't happened (although some have been late) and it's a source of conflict because we want a later curfew at least on friday and saturday.


enough about what we've been doing. about yerevan... i have to admit that i am not that impressed. despite the mountains and hills, the abundant greenery and the architecture composed of pink rock (which is typical armenian), there is something lacking. yerevan itself is not charming. i have not had an illuminating "oh my god my ancestors were here" moment, not yet at least. i'm actually really looking forward to getting out of yerevan. the way people dress here... it pains me to see it, and pains me even more to say it, but it's just not classy at all. the girls wear make-up and heels at all times and it just doesn't look good. the boys are guido's. the obvious explanation to me is that they had been so repressed by communism that they just went the other way completely. i don't even know if they think westerners dress like that, or what, but it's just not pleasant to see. i can't wait to get into the mountains and just elsewhere.



the first few days were much more intense. now everyone wants to have fun and recreate what we had so bad that it's just a dud. i haven't really spent a moment alone since i got here... i wonder when it'll get to me.

Monday, June 30, 2008

"come on, baby!"

bari yegak!


the flight from prague to yerevan was so short. i slept most of it, and i arrived at 4am. hasmik, our coordinator, was waiting for me with andrew, an australian armenian who got there about the same time. he'd been travelling for three days! azniv stays with us at all times at the dorm, which is gorgeous. we've got three floors, and a view. the main floor, the sexy ladies' floor and the sexy dudes' floor. i'm saying sexy because we are probably the best-looking bunch of armenians ever. actually scratch that, we're probably the best-looking bunch ever, anywhere. kohar takes care of the food and stuff, she's got a super short mullet and it's fire-engine red. I KNOW.


yesterday was vartavants, an armenian holiday i'd never heard of. i'm going to say it's religious to be safe but to be honest we never even made it to the church. basically it involves pouring water over yourself (i'm assuming to wash away your sins? useless for me, obviously). so you can imagine how happy the kids get. they were in groups with reserves of water and would run after us with buckets of water. we were all drenched head to toe. the best part is having to walk it all back, and the same crazy kids run after you. they wait in alleyways and when they see a dry person walk by they yell "YEGEK!!!!" ("come!!") and go nuts. it felt like a mutiny. the best part was when someone dropped water from a balcony onto us, and instead of it being a seven-year-old boy, it was an old lady.


when we got back, kohar had prepared some stuffing for dolma and to quote jirair "misse khotetsink" (we shoved the meat). mam i'm sorry but your dolma is whatever. the president of AGBU came over and we had supper, and we went out to a really crappy club called opear, but had an amazing time. we got to bed at four-ish. we danced at home, played poker, joked around and met adrina, an indian-armenian who is my roomie.


the only glitch is the veeps. there is a group of four that just doesn't hang out with us, and no one knows why. we started calling them the v.i.p.'s, but i seenk zey are verree impoohrtant peeeple and so zey are veeps. there's always this dilemma of "do we tell the veeps," "are the veeps joining us," and going through the veep lounge which is actually a common space on the girls' floor with a telly, but the veeps are always in there. they have a designated speaker whose name i forget and when he speaks, he speaks for them all.


i think i might be the only one to have had the honour of experiencing the apricots so far. i swear, dziran is the fruit of the gods. you have never tasted anything so ... it's a different fruit, it's not even apricots. they don't necessarily look as appetizing but once you start you don't want to stop. mam, remember how i was freaking out over the figs in egypt compared to the ones we get in montreal? that is nothing. not even the same ballpark. armenian dziran is where it's at, and i will die trying to smuggle some back.

we have orientation today, the welcome dinner, and tomorrow we start work. our next day off is july 24th. til then we have work every day, dance, history and language classes, and trips out of yerevan. it's only been a day and i'm having the best time, we're like one big, happy family and everyone gets along 'a merveille.

Saturday, June 28, 2008

it's been a bit of a whirlwind, but all is good. i arrived safely in toronto. isabelle was nice enough to pick me up, and we had dinner together. gigi was no a boat cruise for work so i only saw her briefly before bed. grace took me to the airport the following day. unfortunately, i barely slept on the nearly eight-hour flight to prague (and we left late, too). which means that when we arrived at 6am, i had only slept one hour (it was midnight montreal time). when we landed everyone clapped, and it reminded me of egypt-air flights (or any flight with egyptians on it, for that matter). i almost teared up from the dorkiness. mabrouk!!

i love prague so much, it is so beautiful. you all know i love to just get lost in random streets a l'etranger and prague is perfect for that. but i did miss out on a lot simply because i was so exhausted. my carry-on was damn heavy, and i fell asleep about ten times. i fell asleep in a park twice, twice in a metro station (i woke up to a controller speaking to me in czech. the metro arrived right then and i ran off, i suspect he was telling me i looked like sleeping beauty, or that i was drooling), and twice in a public circle. i didn't even have the energy to go to any museums (except for the decorative arts - very nice but too short), and i came to the airport a little earlier than required. i didn't have that free hotel at all, i guess i had misunderstood. otherwise i would have napped in the morning and taken full advantage.

anyway, now i'm at the airport waiting for boarding to start. i'm bored out of my skull and i do not like czech food at all. i had a frankfurter with three different kinds of mustard (all gross) for breakfast, it cost me twenty-five bucks and it tasted like a lester's hot dog. tse les hot-dog chou-moutarde-raaaalish, la, d'la belle province, la... bah ouais, ca goutait ca, pis pour ce prix-la, en plux. next time i'll ask before i order some random item off the menu just because i'm famished.

armenia is just a few hours away and i'm so anxious... grace and hampo gave me the lo-down on what it's really going to be like, and i have a friend who has already suggested places to go to.


papi, vania, mami, believe it or not, tsezi ge garotnamgor (well van, you can go ahead and believe it) yev bidi ouzeyi vor amenknis miyasin elank. ayo, nouynisk papi'n yev mami'n miyasin. i must be delirious? ideally that's the way it would have been done... pour moi, en tout cas. batchigner.


i think i'll get drunk on my flight.